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A photographer reflects on her role in documenting the lives of Israel’s hostage families, filled with pain and hope.
By PAULINA PATIMER DECEMBER 5, 2024 02:33
The writer documents the ruins at Kibbutz Be’eri in November 2023. The makeshift inscriptions amid the charred surroundings include a Star of David, ‘Am Yisrael Chai,’ and words from ZAKA special rescue units.
(photo credit: Adar Eyal)
My friendship with photography has lasted a long time. Some people sing from a young age, some dance, and I have always seen the world through frames and angles. On October 7, 2023, my relationship with photography and documentation took on a deeper meaning.
Perhaps because I come from a family of Holocaust survivors, in which very little was ever spoken about what they went through, and certainly no photos or documents existed to tell the whole story. From the first moments of this terrible war, I realized that documentation is priceless, and I made this my mission.
Being a photographer means seeing without being seen. It means researching, learning, and touching emotions and not being afraid of the pain. But how can you not cry when you see a baby’s crib full of blood, a burnt family home, or bodies in ZAKA bags?
During the documentation of the devastation on the kibbutzim near the Gaza border – as I absorbed the scent of blood and death, leaving a piece of my heart in every home I entered – I promised myself I wouldn’t stop there.
I have to reach the families that survived, the families that were forced to move, and especially – the families of the hostages. Since November 2023, there has been only one Saturday rally that I missed.
Privilege with pain
I felt the weight of the pain in the kibbutzim, but the pain of the families of the hostages is different. It is a living pain, full of the unknown, full of hope, full of a silent scream and a prayer for the return of their loved ones. Standing before these people at their most difficult moments, photographing them at funerals, birthdays, rallies, marches, and more intimate events, and sometimes, at their most emotional moments when some of the hostages returned home.
This entire journey, despite all the difficulty, is an enormous privilege for me.
I have a list of the events that have moved me the most in terms of photographing The Hostage Family Forum, from the cries of the families at the Gaza border, back in January, to the celebration of little Kfir Bibas’ first birthday to Hanan Yablonka’s funeral. And as I look back, more painful events come to mind, one after the other. Each family’s story is important and heartbreaking, and each one must be photographed and heard in order to share with the world the true story of Israel’s pain and hope. Over the past year, my approach to photography has changed completely.
At first, I felt unsure about approaching and speaking to the families. I focused mainly on capturing the moments without disturbing them, without imposing my presence. But today, everything is different. Over time, many of these families have become close friends as well as sources of inspiration. With their unimaginable pain and strength, they have taught me what it means to stand strong, what endless hope and love are, and what it truly means to “never give up.”
It is a great privilege to meet so many strong individuals – people who face the ocean of memories and fear but never give up. They are not only fighting for the hostages, they are fighting for all of us, for the entire State of Israel. Every moment with them is a gift I don’t take for granted and from which I draw strength to remain focused on my own mission – to continue capturing the story.
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As a photographer, I allow myself to claim that the “victory images,” literally speaking, are the ones of the Angrest family with Matan; the families of the observation soldiers with all the girls together; the Bibas, Miran, Yahalomi, Shemtov, and all the other families.
The victory photos are the return of all the hostages, all of them. A sad and heartbreaking, but extremely necessary reunion for the families of the fallen hostages.
Just this week, we were informed of Omer Neutra’s death on October 7. Omer’s body is still being held by Hamas but must be brought back to Israel.
All of the 100 hostages must come back home together because it’s time for better days for all of us.
The writer is a photographer who has been documenting the families of the kidnapped, the evacuees, and the murdered since October 7. She documents the weekly unity rally, “Singing Together for Their Return,” which takes place every Tuesday at 8 p.m. at Hostages Square in Tel Aviv.
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